Shotgun kicking your bitch ass!

Dont think i can take anymore of this bollocks..
being an apprentice chef means that i am required to go to tafe in box hill once a week .. now theres two major things wrong with this
A: im 22 and the class in mainly made up of 18 year oldbox hill station rats and...
B: Shotgun!!

Shotgun is this guy in my class who i am pretty sure was cloned from a growth in my back to be my evil twin as he epitimises everything i find wrong with the universe.
His many list of quirks includes telling me about all the hardcore drugs he does on the weekend and all the "weak dogs" him and his boys gang bashed cos they we're getting "Fuckin lippy with us" he also loves telling storys about how he went bird shooting with his cus in libya and " Shot a fuckin A.K mate for serious a fuckin A.K and i wasnt even scared or nothin i just fuckin shot the fuckin birds to pieces " oh and he also finds the topic of september 11 absolutley hilarious .But that i could handle cos lets face it i live in bayswater and pretty much half of the youth of bayswater is exactly like this ,the one thing i cant handle is his use of the fuckin word shotgun!.

I'm sure we're all aware of the shotgun rule regarding the front seat of the car.. this guy shotguns everything and i mean everything he shotguns parsley , he shotguns lighters ,he shotguns pencils HE SHOTGUNS SHIT THAT BELONGS TO PPL HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW!.For some reason he's come to the thought space that as long as he says shotgun that now that item no matter what it is now belongs to him , i had to calmly explain to him the other day that just becasue he says SHOTGUN FIVE DOLLARS doesnt mean he can have the five dollars i just took out of my wallet and put on the table...i think the only way to defeat this mindless clone bogan is to challenge him to a duel. I Jazzcat challenge you shotgun to.. Pistols at dawn!.

SHOTGUN PISTOL
we both get a pistol dickhead
SHOTGUN YOUR PISTOL
*sigh* bang..